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Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
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Symone, 030793Cheryl's blog here. Kind off talky with loads of words. Some make sense some don't. Like this blog, come back and read more, don't like, please don't spam my tag board. Just a school girl going through her school life. Nothing much nothing less. Likes to eat but kind of aware not to eat too much. Thats about it. I felt that night, on the stage, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. What exactly made it worth it? What’s so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming? What’s so great about feeling and dreaming? (By the person who did this skin) — Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Taggings
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Monday, July 25, 2011
Fucking want watch Transformers badly. Saturday, last NE show. Next Sat, preview, shiok ah. Ending soon. Looking and not looking forward. Looking forward cos free my Saturdays. Not looking forward cos will miss a lot of people there and memories there. I still fucking hate the shrilly girl. Today in class, mostly slack. Learnt some new dance moves from Dom Dom and Sheryn. Firstly, Dom taught me, I'm Yours. Sheryn taught me Billionaire. Both are very hard for me. Know they put in a lot of effort into dancing... Not easy feat at all. To people, you don't leave to please others. You live to please yourself. You life is not to be put in others but yourself. You yourself holds the key to all the major and minor events in life so get a hold of YOURSELF. Sunday, July 17, 2011
LOVE, LAUGH & LIVE : LYRICS im all alone again the world is at my fingertips as i write this song with all my love to give so i sing this song to you, im giving this a piece of my heart with a beat to sing it with [ph] some things are once in a lifetime i think this is it so here it is, i share with you my piece of happiness [hook] with all that ill give you just as the sunsets tomorrow is a gift, you cherish right now as it is right now is the moment as the world closes in so open up your heart and mind, to love laugh and live [v2] all you have's today so make the best of it live it to the fullest like tomorrow is the end share the love with people like they were your best friend a little love travels far so start the walk within [ph] some things are once in a lifetime i think this is it so here it is, i share with you my place of happiness [hook] with all that ill give you just as the sunsets tomorrow is a gift, you cherish right now as it is right now is the moment as the world closes in so open up your heart and mind, to love laugh and live [bridge] we have to walk, before we run why hate, when we can love if we try, i promise we can change so much i know it wont be easy but with all the love i get I'll give it back, with this song til it all comes back again Yesterday was a very emo day for me as BB was there, I've decided to stfu^^ They said I was weird to emo. Am I? Always being cheerful was never ever me. NE2 was nice. First time, didn't call marshall, Gerwaine, Lkk. Didn't bully him either. On the other hand, he did quite brought my mood kind off back, Well, ghost stories never fails to bring up my mood. LOL Tekong ghost, possesion, field prayers. So nice, he lift it up just straight before we were going to the parade, With Red Lions coming down with the enthusiastic song, Viva La Vida. Going back, I see the extra girl again.. Speaking of the truth, neither white bear(sun bear in my terms) or YQ is close with her. She only got into the circle because she is affiliated with us. -.- Extra enough? Best part, she whines, like mad. Kind of makes me smirk with disgust and annoy of her disgusting and irritating voice. Its squeaky, shrill and *splat* disgust. *Swallowed puke* On the very other hand, my family got to botanical garden at Burkill Hill to attend a wedding. Its an exquisite wedding as things are really out of the box. Firstly, you can order what set you would like to eat, For example, course A, course B, course C. Best thing, its french dinning. Pity I wasn't there to help my beloved NaiPo to cut.. D: Something funny, friday, kwan tried to help me cut fish and chips. Gives me another sarcastic smirk.. Oh My Gosh! Keep it to myself please! Self control.... I seriously am having a drastic change in attitude right? Yesterday, Junie Grandma told me some words that made me almost broke down and cry. Thankfully, as always, self control, held back my tears. Funny things that happened while we were in conversation, Swee Keow got those barangs away, especially that annoying one. Me and Grandma had a nice one to one talk. Grandma said her own girl told her she has changed. So have I? I really feel very guilty as, if Grandma hadn't come to be attached to our school, She wouldn't have to go through all these tough times... What was running through my mind the whole time she was talking to me, All her telling of how bad she is going through, I really am in a very sorry situation.. All the bad dramas happened cos she got attached to North Vista, knowing guides like us and knowing guider like power of light... She served as a YA because of her enthusiasm and now it is all gone in a flash within a year of bad drama. I really am very sorry about that.. Yet I have no guts to tell her how sorry I am, I'm gutless. What happening to me? Can anyone explain to me? I seem to be pushing people close away from me together with it too.. Purposely... finding their sensitive spots... aggravate them... What is wrong exactly? At least there's some good news, maybe bad. As always, what I do goes by my mood, I've came out with a new style for myself. Straight, edgy, solely black and white. Shopping time coming soon. Cut my hair today. Gonna try grab a shade soon. Maybe should shop for some blazers. Short and long denims. White causal matching up with some accessories? Mphosis would be a good place for it. Black White, your the best, focusing on white, I'm badly tanned recently. Thats as far as today can go so bye. Good luck for readers' theatre tomorrow. Friday, July 15, 2011
I'm questioning myself, where is the fucking motivation. Firstly, my own dear class is a hectic. Secondly, I'm not appreciate for giving my best to my CCA. Training the sec 1s, I know you all ain't perfect human beings luh. At least there is something call effort ain't? Ncc wasn't harsh on you because you aren't their cadets, I'm harsh on you cos I don't want you to loss your spot in GOH. I have to be honest you weren't exposed to much drills but it obvious whether you are giving your best or not. Have you not heard what that poor guy was saying, If you were his cadet, he would have made you run god knows how many rounds or might as well just pump you. Sharlene says not to be harsh on all of you but if there's no discipline, what is the point of drill luh. Your dear trainer wanted me there because I have authority to scold you. To punish you and push you to train harder if you don't meet up to expectation. I've already said, I'll make you hate me for being a mean senior this year. I meant it. If you can't even pass my standard in drills, how are you going the pass the one of Miss Dino's? You don't appreciate me now, I can take it lightly, scold me for all you like. Too bad I'm a very good bitch, I bitch about everything everyday. Too bad I'm your senior, not as gentle and caring as your "good" seniors that can't bare to shout, punish you. To that fucked up bb, thank you uh, Make me feel so not appreciated, Accuse me of being a slacker in front of NCC and SJAB right? Don't blame me for ignoring you. I'm not gonna bear anymore displeasure. I'm gonna spread it all out already. Sharlene said not to get so piss, hit something, hahah. Nice one, no motivation, I ain't gonna do anymore extra things in there. If your drills sucks to the max, fine, I'll walk away and don't correct you. If you accuse me of a slacker, fine, I'll slack right there and do nothing, Best of all, I'll be what the power of light say, go Jurong Bird Park fly kite. Isn't that much better? I'll only appear when Miss Dino is there, good enough? I ain't gonna fucking do anything since I'm not appreciated. To class, I've helped the whole class in improving your studies, don't appreciate me, fine. I won't help a single bit of you in homework. Don't ask me to help you with this or that question, this or that work. Its all worthless. -.- Monday, July 11, 2011
Firstly, To the good good goodie girl/ Back gossiper, stabber. You've got any problem with me, say it straight in my face. Don't make GF stuck in the middle. Don't keep anything in suspense and say things straight forward. I know you've been through a lot this year uh. No need to turn into so negative. My negative side is darker then yours. To the backstabber that led her there, double face hypocrite -.- Don't misled that goodie girl out of hands. You'll pay doubly for it. I'm not for revenge and for peace. Don't get on my nerves or you'll regret it I sumpa. I never had shown any of you in this whole clique how nice my attitude is ain't? Reason why is because I've been controlling it quite well. Get a very good hold of myself. Unlike some people who just can't seem to, grow up -.- I know uh, I've been leaking out some of my attitude out quite a lot recently uh. Its partly because of double faces, backstabbers and hypocrites like you. An advice, I don't need a friend like you so gtfo me. Deserve no attention for me attention seekers. To goody good girl, remember to get out of this fucked up school soon, The system here ain't good, you aren't fitted for place like this. Get away from bad influence too -.- I'm born a bitch, I'm born this way. Not happy with me, fuck far far away. This post is posted exclusively for, backstabbers, back gossipers, hypocrites, double face and extra large. -.- I've decided to associate extra large with people like you.^^ Fit perfectly and since you are good friends as well. Maybe not in deep surface, never know what hypocrite is up to. -.- Monday, July 4, 2011
Thank you blood related, For making my bloody day so fucking 'nice' Thats happy youth day for me ain't? Crying over shits like that is so not worth it so stop crying. Assholes and bastards. Who ask that bastard to always take my stuff without asking? You bitch still have the guts to tell me to bare with it? Doing it so many many countless times? Come on! I've counted it up to like umpteen times and yet all I can think of is why do I have to know such a bloody bastard and bitch? Why did I have to have such a genes in me? You said I have bad temper? So? Who turned someone who has a good patience and was gentle despite being tomboy to turn into someone so fucked up and bitchy about everything? Who was the one who turned so much stress to her own child? Telling her so much she was unwilling to hear? Who the fuck was the one who made her give up on hope when she told her in as a kiddo to dream? So now, can you please tell me, which fucking bitch right here typing is not the girl she was? So sweet and nice always smiling? Now always forcing a smile. Smiling for others and not for herself? What the fuck does this means? Its been so so so long since I last smiled for myself. How is that? Do you ever try to understand me? How I ever felt? How I ever tried my best to make everyone happy? I beared with your son as much as I can you know? He really push me to a limit where I can't take it. With your countless stress pressurising, what do you expect from me? I'm human, not some super woman. Even super woman needs rest, where is mine? Tell me and I'll be good. |
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But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you oughta stay |
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